Rudy Mancuso - Christmas Is A Bitch

[Intro]
C  C

[Verse]
C                              Em/B
christmas really freaks me out. It makes me feel alone.
Am                            A
I think that elves are creepy. I'm not a fan of snow.
Dm                          G             C      Fm   G
forgive me when I say that christmas is a bitch.
C                                Em/B
chocolate makes my skin breakout. I don't like decorations.
Am                           A
I'm sick of all these cheesy songs that play on every station.
Dm                        G                       C       E
I think it's all so whack, but people seem to disagree.

[chorus]
Am                               Em
The kids wait up for Santa Claus, the man with overalls.
F                               F                 C/E
he eats their milk and cookies, must have high cholesterol.
Dm                    G                        C         E
but who am I to judge? This guy is not even real.
Am                              Em
cause mistletoe and candy canes, all of its so freaking lame.
F          C/E         Dm 
Sorry if I sound insane.
          C                F                        Fm
christmas sweaters make me itch, decorations always glitch, 
                          C       Fm    G
that's why christmas is a bitch.

[Verse]
        C                           Em/B
There's people shopping at the mall for phones and big TV's,
Am                      A                               
wasting all their money on lights and christmas trees,
Dm                  G                               C       Fm   G
making corporations rich, that's why christmas is a bitch.
    C                        E
and every time I look around, I see a smiling face,
Am        Am/G              F
is this a problem just with me or the human race?
             F                     G
all of these really annoying songs that people love to sing.
C                      E
What can I possibly be missing from this christmas thing?

[chorus]
Am                           Em
Kids wait up for Santa Claus, a weird dude with overalls.
F                                            F               C/E
he eats their milk and cookies, this guy has gotta have high cholesterol.
Dm                          G
but it makes people happy, it makes no sense to me.
C                                         E
It's a fat guy who breaks into your house. It's bullshit.
Am                                   Em
There's mistletoe and candy canes, I find all of this shit so lame.
F                    C/E           Dm
I don't like playing cheerful games.
        C              F                          Fm
If only I could flip a switch, it's a complicated sitch,
                          C       G
that's why christmas is a bitch.

[Outro]
                              F                        G
These stupid sweaters make me itch, decorations always glitch,
                          C
that's why christmas is a bitch.

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